They Told Me 50/50. It Was 5 Per Cent.
Aug 31, 2026Episode 47 · Perspective, performance and money · 55 min
With Layne Beachley AO & Tess Brouwer, featuring Tristan Knowles OAM
About this episode
Tristan Knowles OAM and AIA ambassador has been given his odds twice. At nine he lost his leg to childhood cancer. At twelve he found out that the 50/50 his parents and his doctor gave him when the cancer came back in his lung was a white lie, and that his real chance of surviving had been closer to 5 per cent. This week he sits down with Layne and Tess to talk about what that does to a person, and what he built out of it.
The conversation runs from a foam cover cut off a prosthetic leg at 17, to gold in Beijing and the email that was waiting when the team got home, to the subject nobody expects a six-time Paralympian to be an expert in: money, and what financial stress quietly takes from everything else.
Key takeaways
- Perspective is practised, not inherited. When the cancer returned, his parents and his doctor agreed on an answer before he asked the question, and told him 50/50. He learned the real number at twelve, and it made him permanently curious about how we choose to turn up rather than what happens to us.
- Shame hides under whatever you cover it with. At 17 he cut the foam cover off his prosthetic leg, went to school with the titanium showing, and calls it the most liberating feeling he has had. The cover was never about the leg.
- Success is having no regrets, not winning. Did I do everything I said I would? Did I make the sacrifices? Did I ask for the help? If the answers are yes, that is success, whatever the result on the day.
- Being the best is more dangerous than chasing it. An email from their coach was waiting when the team got home with gold from Beijing. They broke wheelchair basketball into 30 components, ranked themselves on every one, and found out how far off number one they still were.
- Financial stress and mental health run in both directions. Beyond Blue and ASIC found someone under financial stress is twice as likely to face mental health challenges, and that the same is true in reverse. Two thirds of calls to Lifeline involve money.
- Start with the split, not the spreadsheet. Around 50 per cent of what comes in covers the essentials. Halve what is left: 25 per cent invested for your future self, 25 per cent to enjoy now. The number matters less than knowing where it goes.
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Transcript
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0:00Challenge accepted▾
Tristan, Layne & Tess (0:00):
You're tuning into A Wake Up Call, which is your weekly dose of purpose, packed with science-backed tools to beat burnout and boost happiness. Hosted by us, Tess Brouwer and seven-time world champion Layne Beachley. We're the founders of Awake Academy. This podcast mixes raw life lessons, expert wisdom and practical tips to help you stop sleepwalking through life and start living it on your terms. You ready to wake up and thrive? Let's go. Season three is proudly brought to you by AIA, a leading life, health and wellbeing insurer supporting healthier, longer, better lives. Protect what matters most, and AIA will help you to do it for life.
Welcome back, Dream Team, and welcome to A Wake Up Call. Today's guest epitomises high performance under pressure across two completely different arenas: elite international sport and corporate leadership. Tristan Knowles OAM is a six-time Paralympian, Paralympic gold medallist, back-to-back world champion, and captain of the Australian Rollers wheelchair basketball team. But off the court, he's spent over a decade applying those exact elite sport principles to leading high performance teams in financial advice and wealth management, as an AIA ambassador. As a two-time childhood cancer survivor and above-the-knee amputee who adopted a challenge-accepted mindset at age nine, Tristan brings a rare perspective on resilience, building a winning team culture, financial wellbeing, and what success really means. Today we're exploring not only how to perform, but who we become in the pursuit of success. Tristan Knowles, welcome to A Wake Up Call. Lovely to be here. Thanks for having me.
1:41I wouldn't change a thing▾
Tristan, Layne & Tess (1:41):
Now, you know that we start every episode with a wake up call that changed your life, but I'm so interested to know how that has changed the course of your life in a challenge-accepted way. Yeah, I guess I'm fortunate to have learnt that lesson that life is really precious, but I didn't learn it overnight. It was a bit of a journey. For me, I went through some pretty challenging things as a kid in the form of childhood cancer. We'll probably talk a little bit more about that in a moment, but it might sound strange, but for me, beating cancer twice only felt like I won half the battle, because as a kid I was absolutely convinced that I was going to grow up and play AFL football for Hawthorn. The amputation for me was a real challenge, and I struggled with it for a lot of my teens. When I got to the age of 17, a couple of things happened, and I was in the car with my dad, and he said, "Tristan, if we got home and someone knocked on the door and said we can go back in time and change everything, what would you say?" It wasn't just my answer, but I think how quickly I answered my dad. I said, "Dad, I wouldn't change a thing." So we spoke a bit more about what allowed me to get to the age of 17 and respond to that question that way, and I even looked back at what I went through as a kid as a blessing, because it changed who I was, but I'd learnt to love who I was, and I was pretty determined to continue forward in life as an amputee, having learnt what I'd learnt. As tough as it was at the time, I was grateful for what I went through, because it certainly taught me a lot about being grateful, and perspective, and the importance of mindset, and that things don't always go to plan.
Exactly. How old were you when your leg was amputated? Nine years old. Nine. That's when you adopted the challenge-accepted mindset.
I think so, yeah. My parents were instrumental in keeping me really positive, and so was my doctor. I don't know why, but I've always related things to numbers, and I was always asking my doctor the first time that I was sick, what are my chances of surviving, and he'd always tell me 70 per cent. My parents never allowed me to look at things negatively, and for some reason I was always convinced that I would be okay, and then went into remission and had a bit of a relapse, which was the real challenge from a mental perspective. When your dad asked you that question, "Would you go back in time?", do you think there was a part of him that wanted to go back in time as well? What do you think his answer would have been? Yeah, I guess I hoped that he asked that question knowing what my response would be, because I think as a parent you only want the best for your kids, and you want them to love the life that they've got. I'm sure parts of him were really intrigued as to how I would answer it and why I answered it that way. But yeah, it certainly sparked a pretty interesting conversation.
Why did you answer it that way? Like, 17-year-olds are either really wise or really ignorant, and of course you're the wise one because you'd been through so much, but why did you answer it that way?
5:03The 50/50 white lie▾
Tristan, Layne & Tess (5:03):
Yeah, I think going through something like cancer and being forced to think about mortality and death, it makes you grow up really, really quick. And sad as well, I got to know a lot of kids that weren't as lucky as me, that didn't make it. But I think when I relapsed, it was exactly two years after being put in remission. The cancer returned in my lung, and I learned something the first time that I was sick that's a pretty tough lesson for anyone to learn, and that was: the two places that you don't want cancer is your lung and your brain. For me, it was the kids that had those types of cancer that didn't make it. So when my doctor told me that the cancer had come back in my lung, I was absolutely distraught, hysterical. And when I calmed down, I asked my doctor the same question again. I said, "What are my chances of surviving?" And I didn't realise this, but Mum and Dad and my doctor anticipated me asking that question, and they agreed on a response, and the response was 50/50. So I'd gone from sitting there in a moment, for the very, very first time allowing the thought to enter my head that I wasn't going to make it, to hearing 50/50, and it was a real lesson for me in perspective. Mum and Dad got me to think about being so upset, and then hearing 50/50, and then convinced again that I was going to be okay. It was only going into remission the second time that Mum and Dad confessed that they did tell me a bit of a white lie, because my chances of surviving were only around 5 to 10 per cent. Oh, wow.
6:38Cutting the cover off▾
Tristan, Layne & Tess (6:38):
And I was 12 when they told me this, and it made me fascinated with mindset and perspective and how we choose to turn up. So going back to your question, Tess, around why I chose at the age of 17 to answer that question from my dad that way: I think I knew that statistically I was extremely lucky to be alive. Very, very grateful for what I had, not what I didn't have, which was a second leg. But it did take most of my teens to get to that point where I was truly comfortable and content in my own skin. And up until that point, I used to wear a foam cover over my prosthetic leg, and I realised one morning when I was 17, on the couch eating cereal, getting ready for school, looking at my leg wearing a pair of shorts, and it dawned on me in that moment why I used to wear this cover. And it was obvious, right? I was trying to hide it. And to a large extent, I'd been ashamed for a lot of years to be an amputee. And something came over me. I went to the kitchen, I cut the cover off, I went to school with my leg fully exposed, as you can see it right now, sort of titanium and carbon fibre, and it was the most liberating feeling I've ever had, because I felt truly free for the first time that I could remember. How did the kids at school respond?
Yeah, certainly raised a few eyebrows, but I had a really supportive group of friends. And I'd given them the heads up that morning that, hey, I'm coming to school a little bit different today. But no, all the kids were great. And that's one of the challenges of a teenager, you feel all these pressures to be normal, whatever that is, right? And I just wanted to try and fit in and be normal, and I got to that age at 17, I thought, bugger it. Life's short. This is me. Take it or leave it. How beautiful. And when you talked about being free just then, I saw your body change, I felt the emotion in you. What does being free mean? How did that moment of being free change the course of your life? I think it just allows you to concentrate on you and all the good things and the happiness in your life, instead of that happiness some days being drowned out by "what do people think about me?" and being worried about certain things happening. So it just allowed me to focus on the positive things and being truly grateful for all the wonderful things that I had in life, because there are a lot of them. So for me, it was a choice to focus on those things, as opposed to what someone else might think.
And those beautiful life lessons you've now been able to bring into the world in a completely different forum, whether it's on the basketball court with your team, or whether it's in the boardrooms with leaders and CEOs and people that want to learn how to adopt such a positive mindset and find gratitude in life. What do you think stops people from embracing that mindset? Because a lot of us have everything, yet we still ruminate around the negative and we still get stuck in how bad things can be. What stops us from adopting that mindset? And then how do you help people apply that? It's a tough one. Yeah, it's a tough one. I think, for me, perspective and being grateful, and actively practising being grateful, I think are really, really important. And I think it's obnoxious to think that any one of us knows everything. There's so much we can learn from other people and other people's journeys and challenges. I think the day that you sit back and go, "I know everything, there's no more developing and evolving for me," is a really dangerous time. So I think that no matter how much success you're able to go on to achieve in life, there are always things that you can learn from other people and other people's experiences and journeys. Yeah. How do you maintain perspective? Like, what happens when you have a bad day?
I think perspective has been instilled in me from a really young age. I think I was a typical sort of young male athlete that thought you could always win everything. I know you come from that world too, Layne, as well, where... And I am not that person... But I think sport played a really big part in my life. It's a very good teacher of lessons, sport, because you can't win every time.
No. Despite working your backside off and controlling all the things that you can control, there's always a couple of things outside of your control that can go wrong, and there's always someone that's training just as hard as you as well, that's also prepared to go to lengths to win. So I think sport taught me that you don't always get what you want, and that's okay. Because it's important to acknowledge that every single story of success and triumph has adversity in it. So I think those days where things aren't going to plan, yeah, it's okay to feel a bit down in the dumps and pissed off in the moment, but you can't stay in that place for very long. And I like to look at those setbacks and challenges, and those days or weeks where everything's going wrong, and say, hey, maybe this is the adversity that I need to navigate through to get where I need to get to. And that's why I think it's really important that your why needs to be really, really clear, because I think that's the thing that guides you through those tough patches. What's your why?
12:18Your why, and the four years after Athens▾
Tristan, Layne & Tess (12:18):
I want to be as good as I possibly can. My introduction to, and again it goes back to what sport taught me, but I went off to my first Paralympic Games in 2004 as a 21-year-old. And we got all the way through to the gold medal game and got beat by Canada. And it was heartbreaking, how distraught we were, but it's nearly a blessing, getting that close to the holy grail so young in my career, that it has made me so much hungrier. And thankfully, a lot of the guys in the team were prepared to go away and sacrifice even more in the next four years, and we were able to redeem ourselves in 2008 by beating the Canadians in the gold medal game. But I think that period of my life taught me that if I was prepared to work really, really hard, anything was possible. It also taught me that you can't win every time as well. I love the challenge, why I still play at 43 at the highest level. I may be a little bit selfish and want that fairytale ending, but at the end of the day, I'm happy to commit to the process, do all the hard work and go on that journey with my teammates. But yeah, I'd love to taste it again. Taste the gold. It's an insatiable appetite, an insatiable thirst. Tristan, you talked just then around something that we really want to instill in people, which is control what you can control. And I have witnessed people in a spinal ward lose the one thing they thought they can control, their body. And then they took control of their mind, and life changed, including my own life. What can you control from a mindset perspective? What has helped you understand this principle and apply it to your life? Because it looks like you've locked in, you understand it, and it has almost become part of your DNA. Today we see people try and control their day by what they consume, the media, gossiping, venting, talking, like everything outside of them. How do you coach people to stay in themselves and control what they can control?
It's hard sometimes. That's good to know. We're all human.
14:44Success is having no regrets▾
Tristan, Layne & Tess (14:44):
Yeah, exactly. We're all human. I think, for me, how I'd answer that is to explore how I define success. Because you can define it a number of different ways, and your experiences, and as you get older, might change the way that you think of what success is. Because for me, in the early days, as a younger athlete, I thought success meant winning, until you realise that you can't win every time. So you spend a bit more time thinking about, well, what is success? And for me, it comes down to having no regrets. And it's being really, really clear on what your why is, how you're going to get from where you are to that point, having a really, really clear plan. I'm a bit of an OCD planner. I like to have a really clear plan out, checkpoints along the way. It's what makes you a great financial planner.
Yeah, I hope so. But you know what, it's like being an athlete, that stuff gets drummed into your head at a really young age, around goal setting and accountability and being able to stop and self-reflect, which can be really uncomfortable, because sometimes you come to some realisations that you're not on track and you're not where you thought you might be. But I think ultimately it's getting to those points in life where you do stop for a moment and just look back over your shoulder and self-reflect. Because for me, if you can answer questions like, did I do everything that I said I would? Did I make all the sacrifices? Did I get the help from people and learn the things that I set out to? If the answer to those types of questions is yes, for me, that's success. It's a moment where you should feel really, really proud of yourself, regardless of what the outcome or the result were.
16:32What comes after gold: hunter or hunted▾
Tristan, Layne & Tess (16:32):
Did you ever have a moment where you were standing on top of the world, you had those gold medals and those world championships, and you weren't happy with the person that you were? I ask that question, it's pretty loaded, because I had that experience. Because I won seven world titles, but five in fear, and the fear-based world titles were not process-driven, they were outcome-driven. So I was standing on top of the world, but I felt really alone in that moment. I felt really, ah, just abandoned. I had abandoned myself, because the outcome was more important than the person I was. Did you ever experience that? I never had that emptiness feeling after successes, but I certainly had feelings of fear and anxiety around: I've reached the top of the mountain, now what? And I'm really lucky to play a team sport, so when you've got those feelings, you've always got a handful of teammates that you can just go, "Hey, is it weird that I'm feeling this?"
Yeah, the gold medal effect, it's called. Yeah, "Is it weird that I'm feeling this?" And I had some really great coaches as well. Actually, when we won gold, that was the first time that group had experienced ultimate success together, and we celebrated really, really hard in Beijing before we got home. But we got home to our home ports, and there was an email waiting for us from our head coach. His name was Ben Ettridge, and this email basically said, in no uncertain words, that if we turn up to world championships in two years' time and play at that standard, it's probably not going to be good enough. There'll be other teams that work us out and are able to beat us. So the work starts now?
Yeah. But he asked us to have a think about our mentality and approach in that four years between Athens and Beijing, in particular regarding this concept of the hunter versus the hunted. And we realised we hadn't been the best team in the world for the four years leading into Beijing, and that's how we trained, that's how we thought, that's how we played, that's how we made decisions. We knew we weren't the best, and it made us super hungry and super relentless in everything that we did. And the danger was that we get home after Beijing and go, "We're the best." Job's done. Yeah. "We're the best." And it was like, how do we find a mindset and a mentality that keeps us really, really hungry? So there was certainly, yeah, that feeling of ecstasy after winning a gold medal is insane, but when you come down off that, it's fear, anxiety, what do I do next? Do I need to defend it? Are there other things in life that are going to bring that same joy and happiness and purpose as well? But yeah, it's certainly a process, because the emotions are immensely consuming.
What an amazing moment of coaching, for you to be, "Okay, well, that's your new target." So you would have lost that loss pretty quickly, because you realised what the new target was. You would have had that, you were hunted... Constantly. ...for most of your career. And you won six in a row, right?
Yeah. So that's a long period of time to have... I was hunted and stalked.
Yeah, to have a target on your back for that long. So how did you, as a team, or from a mindset position, you were leading this as captain, you switched from being, what was it, the hunted, because you switched from being hunted to hunter. We had to try and stay the hunter. How did you do that? Because I look at this, like, let's relate this back to normal corporate world, right? Or just normal life. Is that there are a lot of threats that you have to escape from: number one, the voice in your own head; number two, the voices that you listen to; and number three, what you believe you can achieve, right? How do you keep that challenge-accepted mindset with a new target?
20:40Thirty parts of the game▾
Tristan, Layne & Tess (20:40):
Yeah, it's a good question. So I wasn't the captain back during that period. We were led by Brad Ness, who is now our head coach, who's an incredible leader. But facilitated by our head coach at the time, we went through a series of, I guess, sessions together, where we picked apart the game of wheelchair basketball into about 30 different components. And what we did was we ranked where we thought we sat on each of those 30 things that make up the game of wheelchair basketball. And it was a very humbling process, because we realised, looking at where we ranked ourselves on those 30 things, we were like, "Guys, we're not that good at this sport. We have to find a way to get better." I know that example is elite sport at the highest level, but I think you can take that kind of approach to anything in life. Whether it's a hobby or a pursuit or your job or relationships, you can pick apart whatever that is into lots of different things and work out where you need to get better. And that proved to be a really great exercise for us, because it made us hungry. It made us want to get to number one in the world at as many different parts of the game of wheelchair basketball as possible. So you essentially became a student of the game, and as we know, the opposite of fear isn't love, it's actually play and curiosity, and bringing fun back into the environment. So you're now 43. You're still aspiring to win gold medals and world championships. How do you maintain, now that you've broken the game down to those 30 incremental parts and you understand how you fit into all of those positions, how do you maintain the motivation, the curiosity and the playfulness to keep overcoming the fear of failure, and keep challenging yourself to show up as the best version of you every single day? Because there's so many things outside of your control that are going to tell you that you're never going to make it, that you're old, you're tired, you're worn out.
You've been hunted. Yeah, you've been hunted. So how do you maintain, and I know earlier you talked about perspective and all of those things, but what's the mindset hack that you can share with us? Because I'm really curious to know, because I'm 54 and I still love to surf, and I'd still love to be able to compete, but I've lost that sense of curiosity and playfulness within the competition arena. I think, yeah, "Why am I still doing it?" That's a way better, easier way to answer the question.
Yeah. Why are you still doing it? Obviously, I've been extremely lucky to experience everything that sport can teach. I've felt what it feels like to get to the very, very top, and it feels incredible. I've felt the heartbreak of nearly getting there. And I've played in quarterfinals at Paralympic Games and lost, and just bombed out in a quarterfinal. So I've experienced all of it. I think there's that ultra-competitiveness inside me that drives the day to day, the early mornings, the before work, the after work, that probably drives that. But at the age of 43, Layne, I think you've hit the nail on the head around that playfulness and love. I love the sport. I love my teammates. I love being on the road with them. I love experiencing whether it's going to be that absolute joy and thrill of winning, or whether we fall short and we buckle up and we go again. I love whatever sport dishes out. And I think I'm very, very lucky that my body has held up and I've had no major injury. So for me, training is not a chore, and I don't feel sore after every session, and sore getting out of bed. You're not training hard enough, young man.
Let me write that down. Schooled by Layne Beachley, 101. But I think I love the sport, and I think the reason that's important is, like yourself, when I stop competing at that high level, I'll still be involved in the sport somehow. Because, yeah, I do love it, and it does bring a lot of joy. And I think the other thing too, the last sort of seven or eight years, the Aussie team has gone through a bit of a rebuild structure. We've had a number of really bright young talents enter our squad, who are now in their early 20s and now some of the best players in the world. So it's pretty cool as a 43-year-old to hit the road, and your roommates are, you know, 21-year-olds. They're hungry. They teach you new things as well. They weren't born when you went to your first Olympics. And they remind me of that too, Layne. But yeah, it's very, very cool to be a part of a team like that. And we know we're fifth in the world at the moment. We've beaten every team in the top 10 in the last 18 months. So we know that we're thereabouts, and we're in there with a shot. And I truly believe if we control the things that we can control, then we can go all the way at world championships next month in Canada. And then obviously we set our thoughts on LA in 2028. But yeah, I think the underlying thing for me now, Layne, compared to my early stages playing, is I just love the sport.
25:59What Paralympians need from Australia▾
Tristan, Layne & Tess (25:59):
I want to take a step change in a second and talk to you about money. And I want to wrap up this last section learning about your Paralympic journey. What is it that you need from Australia, the government, to support you on this journey? Because you work a full-time job, you're a gold medal athlete, you're a captain of a basketball team that gets less funding, less support. How do Australians support you? Because I just see this incredible moment in time where we can transfer funding and help you guys out. When I was in the spinal ward, the Paralympic rugby team came in and were teaching the young boys how to use their wheelchair for the first time. And they played an exhibition rugby game on the courts outside of Royal Ryde Rehab. And I sat there, I was holding my breath, I'm even emotional thinking about it now, for two reasons: you guys are hard. You're the hardest athletes I've ever seen. Very tough.
Very tough, like bashing into each other at such a high speed. But the mental resilience to learn something new, to push past what you don't have anymore and to go for it, was something that I still find quite overwhelming today. To then learn that you get nowhere near the amount of funding that a normal person would get, what's our call out? Like, how can we help you in this moment? We have a quick favour to ask. If this podcast has been landing for you, please hit subscribe and leave us a rating or review. It helps us grow the show and keep bringing these conversations to more people. Watch as much para-sport as you can. Like, eyes on our sport is incredibly important from the perspective of creating a product that corporate Australia wants to be a part of. And I don't blame corporate Australia, because it was only two Paralympics ago did a commercial network in Australia put their hand up and say, "We actually want to pay to put this stuff on TV."
What network was that? So Seven, and now Nine. Shout out Seven and Nine, thank you for doing that.
But I've been a part of para-sport for 25 years now, and I've seen it evolve, and we're on the right track, which is the positive thing. But there still is a gap. You know, the Tokyo Paralympics were the first Paralympics where the Australian government matched the payment they make to Olympians for winning a medal. So up until Tokyo, Paralympians never received, yeah, never received a payment for winning a medal. So my first question was, are we backdating it? No, no, they're not. But you know, these types of things are happening, and I've seen the change in narrative of Paralympics Australia, who is our sort of governing body, from 25 years ago, where it was going to corporate Australia with your hand out, saying, "Can you donate some money to get our athletes prepared for the Paralympics?", to now, where it's, "Here's our product, here's our athletes. If you'd like to partner with us, it's going to cost you some money." So I've seen that change, and rightfully so. But that only happens if Aussies tune in. Watch as much para-sport as you can, especially in the lead-up to Brisbane, right? Like, we're going to see some phenomenal performances and hear some really cool and inspiring stories as well. I bought a virtual seat to the Paralympics.
Yep. Beautiful. Yeah, buy a virtual seat. And also donate. It's tax deductible.
Yes, it is. The queen of lobbying for pay equity is sitting right here, so we might get Layne Beachley on the case. That could be dangerous. All right, so on that note around pay equity and money: you're a financial advisor, and it's amazing that even back when you had your life diagnosis, you were putting a number, a statistic, about it. So you obviously understand the world in numbers. Does money buy happiness?
29:57Money buys time, not happiness▾
Tristan, Layne & Tess (29:57):
No, it doesn't. No, it doesn't. It allows you, I think, to buy your time back, because time is the most important and most valuable thing that we've got, to get to choose how to use that. Time and health.
Time and health. Yep. But no, money certainly allows us to do things in life that we enjoy, but more money does not equal happiness. And I've learned through my career in financial advice, there was a really interesting study done by Beyond Blue and ASIC about five years ago, and they wrote a paper on financial wellbeing and the impact of financial wellbeing on physical and mental health. And the main thing they uncovered in that was that someone experiencing financial stress is twice as likely to experience mental health challenges. Twice as likely. And the terrifying thing is that the same was true in reverse. So someone experiencing mental stress is then twice as likely to go on and experience financial challenges. And I think it doesn't take a rocket scientist to work out that if you're not in a great place financially and mentally, then you're probably not making great choices when it comes to your physical wellbeing. I also learnt that two thirds of all calls to Lifeline include some form of financial stress or financial challenge. It's a big problem. One of the main reasons couples separate, unfortunately, is money problems. So financial wellbeing is a real challenge in Australia. And financial wellbeing can be looked at two ways. Objectively, which is how much money I've got in the bank account, am I on top of my mortgage, what's my superannuation balance, those kinds of things. That's not the important part of financial wellbeing. It's the subjective side. It's how we feel about money. It's our relationship with money. Do we have a sense of control? Do we have a budget in place? Are we controlling how much money is going out versus what's coming in, and are we making the right choices with the amount of money that's left over, so that we get that good balance between living life in the now and making the most of today, but also looking after our future financial self as well. It's more around the relationship that we have, not so much how much of it we have. But as a financial planner, you must come up against an immense amount of resistance from people who have obviously convinced themselves that they have a good relationship, or "we're making the right decisions". How do you gently or delicately navigate that conversation, where people obviously don't want to hear what they don't want to hear at times, especially when it comes to their relationship with money? Yeah, that's why I'm so passionate about financial advice in Australia, because every person or every couple comes to you in a different state. Some people are quite upfront that they've got no idea, and they're really, really worried about different aspects of their financial life. Some people will sit there and tell you that they've got it all worked out, and then it obviously becomes a game of asking the right questions, that you know that they don't have the right answers to, for them to have that aha moment that, actually, there is a bit of a gap in my plan, and we do need to talk more about what the right solution is for me.
So on that, a finance wake-up call is hugely important. I've had a few in my lifetime, where it was actually, I'd realised, for my whole life I have an abundance mindset, which means I can spend really well and I always trust that it's going to come back. But I'm so self-inquiry about, like, what are my strengths, my weaknesses, my triggers, all the rest of it. But what I realised is I was digging my head in the sand about money, and it feels like we are the biggest avoiders when it comes to accountability in that. And it was actually putting my finances in AI that gave me a really quick snapshot of my leakage, my emotional spending and my relationship with money. And a relationship with Charcoal Charlie's. Any organic fruit shop. A health food shop sees me coming.
Gotcha. But in that, how do you find it, when you have that wake-up call, what is it that you see people go through when they have that moment with you? Are they quick to action, or do they just dig their head in the sand further? Like, what's your role in that? Yeah, it sounds like you've taken the right steps, so congratulations on that. But it's all about awareness and curiosity. You know, we, I think...
And a willingness to change? Yeah, potentially, yeah. I think in 2026 we are so great now as a nation talking about the things that we can do for our physical wellbeing and our mental wellbeing. Thankfully, now we talk about it all the time. That's great. But for some reason, sometimes money still seems like a bit of a taboo topic. And knowing what I know about financial wellbeing and how it impacts your physical and mental wellbeing, it should be just as big a part of the conversation. So we've got the luxury of AI now. You can ask all types of different questions. You can go and see a financial planner. There's so many resources online as well. But I think it starts with that curiosity and awareness around: can I do things differently than what I'm currently doing, so that I get slightly better outcomes in the future from a financial perspective? Which we know has a very, very real impact on our physical and mental wellbeing.
35:54Squirrelling it away, and the literacy gap▾
Tristan, Layne & Tess (35:54):
It sure does. And our quality of life. Because I think about teenagers or 20-year-olds today that may be earning a little bit of money, and whether they have the financial acumen, or even just the consideration, of saving today for the future. We're all told to live in the moment and be in the moment and do everything you can right here, right now. But it's the consideration of the future that will give you the perspective that we mentioned earlier, to actually start planning for what that future looks like. And I've always been pretty frugal with money. My dad used to give me pocket money, and if I wanted to buy something, I had to save up for it. And by the time I could afford it, I didn't want it anymore. So I had the compounding interest of savings, because by the time I was ready to spend, I still had that, and I just kept it and hoarded it, to where I had mountains of dollar coins and two dollar coins. She still does, by the way.
Yeah, well, there's not much cash around these days. But where I'm going is that by squirreling away my prize money and living within my means, living comfortably, but still within my means, not feeling the peer group pressure of having to have the latest gadget, the shiniest thing, the newest car, eliminating all of that pressure, I was then able to invest everything I had into property. That was the first piece of financial advice I'd ever received: if you have spare money... and that was from a boyfriend, not from an accountant. And it's that property that then bought me my next one, and bought me my next one. So I'm really grateful that when I squirreled away my prize money, I had $36,000 US under the house, that my dad was mortified when I told him, which then bought me my first apartment. And my girlfriends at the time said, "You're mad at getting in the property market." I bought a $180,000 two-bedroom unit in Dee Why, which then went on to buy me the house that I live in today. How do we get people out of the mindset that squirreling away is a bad thing? Yeah. And it's a different time, too. I'm watching my step kids go through this right now. It's like they can walk in and get a car loan for $45,000, like, straight away, for $50,000, or a car lease for a $100,000 car. And they want to do it. They want to buy the house where they want to live for the rest of their lives. They want to buy the newest car, because they want that car. How do we change this? It's a different age, which makes teaching this lesson of delayed gratification really difficult. Social media, things are right there in front of us all the time. And you're right, look, I feel like the younger generation wants that dream house now. And I remember having this discussion with my parents, they showed me a photo of their first house, and I just, I can't imagine young people these days going, "Yeah, I'm happy to live there."
You let me live in that house? Yeah, but that's how they got it. I think in today's property market, we're going back to that. But I'm similar to you, Layne, like, I was lucky that I had parents that taught me about pocket money and the value of money. And hey, if you don't buy this thing now and you wait a certain amount of months, then you can buy this instead. But suddenly, when you get there, you actually save really hard to get here, and now I actually don't want to go and spend all my money on that. But one thing I've always... how do we make sure that all of our community learns that lesson? And I've always been boggled that our school curriculum doesn't include a standalone topic on financial literacy, teaching kids about debt and compound interest and investing. But we know trigonometry. Yeah, we can work out the area under a bridge if we ever need to.
I imagine you could wave a wand and it's in the curriculum, and you're teaching good financial wellbeing. And to be honest, there's so many adults that I know that need to go through this course, especially women. What is someone with good financial wellbeing in 2026? What does that look like now?
40:00Start with a budget: 50, 25, 25▾
Tristan, Layne & Tess (40:00):
Yeah, listen, I'm glad you asked that question, because I reckon one of the main reasons people don't ever take that first step in controlling their financial world is they think it's complicated. They think it's going to be really complex, that they don't know the answers, that you've got to go and see a financial planner, or that what they have isn't enough to see a financial planner. But it's literally about taking the first step. And for me, it's all about control. So I know people hate hearing the B word, the budget word, but a budget is a great way for you to sit down and be really curious about where your money's going, work out how much money you've got left after the essentials, and then make a decision around how you want to use what's left over. And I'm not going to give you the answer that you think someone with a financial planning background might give, which is invest all of it. I've learnt that life is really precious. So I think there's a nice balancing point between treating yourself and having fun now and making the most of life, but also, it's really, really important to put money away for the future. What are the buckets? What do you recommend? Like, budget bucket, fun budget, everyone talks in buckets. I don't. What do you talk in?
Yeah, I think buckets are a great idea, because it brings awareness as to where the money is going, instead of just one big bucket. Yeah, with a hole in it. Because sometimes you can get away with a bit of spending that you shouldn't. We've got a few little holes in our buckets.
Yeah, but I think buckets is a good way to do it. You have your pay come into your bank account each fortnight or month. They're probably digital buckets now, right? You pop your money in each of your digital accounts, and if there's no money in that bucket when you want to go and buy something, you've got to have the discipline. Discipline is a big part of an effective budget. There's no money in that bucket for now, I've got to wait. So we've got the income bucket, then we've got the necessary expenses bucket. The essentials. The stuff that you can't avoid. Yeah. Then we've got the play bucket, like the fun bucket.
Give me a percentage. Five per cent? Ten per cent? Yeah, I think the essential stuff, so that's your groceries, utilities, maybe not from organic shops, and your rent or your mortgage payments, right, that should be about 50 per cent of what comes in. And then I love the idea of the 50 per cent that's left: I'm going to spend half of that now, and the other half's going away for the future. 25 per cent is invested, the other 25 per cent is play. I mean, everyone's situation is different, right? Did you hear Layne's? Five per cent play.
Well, that's how I've ended up with a couple of houses. Yeah, exactly. There you go. Different times. We should be asking Layne these questions. I know. Tristan, I want to step out and talk about the big picture of life. When we had our prep call, I wanted to ask you what would be a message that you would leave with everyone, and you touched on something so special, about a book you once read that changed your life. And I promised you that I wouldn't read the book, so that you could get our answer live here.
So I'm as blind as you are. Oh, brilliant. Okay. So can you give us an overview of this book, and let us answer the question with you?
43:24Twenty four hours of full health▾
Tristan, Layne & Tess (43:24):
So I reckon at about the age of 40, I started to become acutely aware, or inquisitive, around, like, what's the point of it all? Like, is the life that I'm living now, is that it? Because I wanted to make sure I wasn't missing out on things that really enrich your life. And I read a book called Tuesdays with Morrie, and it's been a book that's been around for a long time. Yeah, I've read it.
But essentially, the book is about a guy called Mitch, who was going through similar types of thoughts that I was. And he was climbing the corporate ladder, working really hard, had a wife and a family. And he was reflecting back on the relationship that he had with his high school professor, who he looked at as a real mentor, and thought, you know, I haven't seen Morrie for decades, I'm going to reach out and see how he's going. Anyway, Mitch learns that Morrie had been diagnosed with a terminal illness and has less than 12 months to live. And the two of them agree that every single Tuesday, Mitch will meet with Morrie and document, with the goal to write a book, on lessons from Morrie, from the perspective that he doesn't have a lot of time left. Which I thought, what a tremendously powerful perspective to be able to listen to someone share. But the part of the book that I was looking for was, Mitch asked Morrie, he said, "If you had your full health back for 24 hours, and then it's over, how would you choose to spend those 24 hours with full health?" And I thought Morrie's answer, again, was exactly what I was hoping to hear from someone staring death in the eye. But I thought I would ask the two of you that question. If you had only 24 hours left with full health, how would you choose to use it? What would you do, TB? I'd be in my garden with my family, and all of them, like, extended family, family, I'd just get everyone in, and I'd just have one big long lunch.
Love it. Like, as simple as that is, it's like, the happiness that I feel when I'm with my family in my garden is unmatched. Yeah. And I think, actually, let's get Layne's answer first, before we chat a bit more about the answers.
Okay, so I'd have to come up after a surf. What would I do? Yeah, I think, similar to Tess, it would be a matter of getting all the people that you love around you, and just being in amongst that unconditional love and affection and attention and connection, and keeping it simple. I like the idea of being in a garden, or being outside in the sunshine, connecting with people that you love. Yeah. I think it's really interesting hearing people answer that question, and that's exactly how Morrie answers his question as well. What about you?
Exactly the same, yeah. I want the people that I love, that make me feel happy, my friends and family. I'd want them at my house, in my comfort place, my safe place. I love the idea of the long lunch. Sit back and talk in detail with people. And I would also potentially just go all in and hire a superyacht for the day, and just give everyone everything. And then I'd be giving all my money to dog shelters, to help people. That highlights Tess's relationship with money right there.
Go all in. Red or black? Red. You said something interesting, Tess, when you answered that. You said, "I know it's simple." I think that's the point of the question, right? It's the simple things that bring joy to our lives. How do we find ways to do more of those simple things in our busy lives? It was one of the things I've learnt the most in my life, after doing a lot of therapy, was I had feared simplicity, and feared stillness, because that's when my head noise would turn up, and my doubt, and my fear, and the itty bitty shitty committee of everything I hadn't achieved or had achieved. When I finally became safe in my body, I came to experience simplicity at its most beauty. And just, what is that? It's ultimate presence. So, what a gift.
Absolutely. Where are you when you're most present? What are you doing? Probably a number of different things. Again, I'm still playing the sport that I love at my age, because I love it, and I just feel myself there. But I love being at home with my partner, Jenna, and my two dogs. Just at home, out in the yard, the sun coming down, watching the Hawks play. Hopefully they're winning.
Visualising yourself on the field. You've had your golden run, Hawks. All right, we're going to wrap up now with the AIA Do It For Life Toolkit, and we've narrowed it down to four buckets. So, LB, do you want to lead him through those buckets?
49:17The AIA Do It For Life toolkit▾
Tristan, Layne & Tess (49:17):
Yes. So, your mind. What's one tool for dealing with adversity that everyone can apply? Asking for help.
Asking for help. Yep. You don't need to go through it by yourself. 100 per cent. Beautiful. Tess, you're going to ask the second one, because it really pertains to money.
What's one thing everyone should do for their financial wellbeing? It's the B word. Have a budget. Have a budget and a plan. A personal budget.
Sorry, sorry the answer's not more exciting. And see your financial advisor. What about team? One behaviour that creates a great culture? Wanting success for each other.
Oh, I like that. Nice. We're good like that. We're good like that. We have totally different objectives at the moment, because we're in different life stages, but our successes, we know each other's limits now, and where we want to go and don't want to go. But in a business relationship, it's so important to have that. I can see that on the court. Everyone wants to win, but everyone's got other lives going on within that. Part of our culture at the moment within the Aussie Rollers is making people feel invincible, making your teammates feel invincible, and then obviously sharing in the joy of their success. Great. And the last bucket is life. One thing we've become too busy to prioritise?
Other than a budget? One thing we've become too busy with... life itself, I think. We just don't prioritise life itself. Yeah. I think the reason I wanted to explore that question with you about the next 24 hours is just to bring us back to what's really important. It's simple things. So life flies by, if you allow it, and it can be unpredictable, and it's precious. So find ways to do more of the simple things.
51:17Until you can see the better life▾
Tristan, Layne & Tess (51:17):
What a wake up call. I love that. Find ways to enjoy the simplicity of life and start living it. Love it, love it. Okay, complete this sentence. Your wake up call is not a wake up call until you... Good one. I think we've actually stumped him.
You got me. It's okay. It's a tough question to answer. No, I've got it. I've got it.
Okay. A wake up call is not a wake up call until you... ...can see the better life in front of you. Nice. What is a better life?
I think it's a life where you appreciate what you've got, that you are completely comfortable in your own skin, and you've found ways and reasons to love yourself, and that you've got a life that is full of meaning and purpose that makes you happy. Makes you invincible, hey? Makes you invincible.
Love it. Gold. Dream Team, what an episode we have had today. Tristan, I feel like one of the biggest lessons you've given me, and I reflect this working with Layne all the time, is who you are in the process matters. And to be your best self, you have to understand and love yourself to be the best version of yourself. And you have given us a perspective that goes deeper than money and budget. It's meaning, it's love of yourself, and it's embracing the fullness of life, and the pain that turns into beauty. And that is the biggest wake up call we can give each other, is just the full embracement of life. So Dream Team, we trust that this has given you a marker on life wellbeing, the inspiration to support the Rollers and all Paralympians, because what an honour it is to hear your story, and hear the story of your team. If you are navigating, or anyone going through anything, please send them this episode, because Tristan is the oracle, and I feel like you need to write a book, Tuesdays with Tristan. Give us a copy. Tristan, how does the Dream Team connect with you? Where can we find you? Where can you find me? Probably Instagram. I'm not a big poster, but the moments that matter, I certainly share them.
All right, we'll share with you there. And if people want to work with you as their financial planner, how do we do that? I've got a website as well, tristanknowles.com.au. Reach out on there, and I'd love to pick up a chat with your fans about anything. I thought you were going to say "my husband". I was like, he would love that.
Tess is your next client. But we'll make sure we put your website in the show notes. Thanks again for joining us. Beautiful. Dream Team, if you can accept one thing today: Challenge Accepted. We have loved this episode with you, Tristan. You are a shining light in our lives, and it's been an honour to get to know you through this whole process, and the partnership with AIA as well.
I've loved it too. Thanks for having me. From us to you: Challenge Accepted. We'll see you next week, Dream Team. Toodles! Toodles!
Awake is a centre of human performance. So if you want to bring more energy, motivation and connection to your team, reach out to us at [email protected].
Guest
Tristan Knowles OAM
Six-time Paralympian, gold medallist and captain of the Australian Rollers, financial adviser and AIA ambassador
On two cancer diagnoses, the odds his parents hid from him, and why the way you handle money decides more than you think.




